LILLY SPEAKS OUT

"Looking back, I wonder if I would have been happier and more fulfilled with him," Lilly said to me as she narrated her story.

She continues: "I wonder if I would have had a better or rosier or even merrier marriage.

Not that my marriage is altogether bad, after all, I have my kids, I live in one of the most advanced nations in the world. But...

I just wonder.

I resumed at FGC Ogbomoso as a junior secondary 2 student, joining my mates a year after they had resumed. 

It was mixed emotions for me. Mixed because I had to leave home and be on my own for the first time. Being responsible for myself, my decisions and my lifestyle. 

I settled in and made some friends. I got involved in the fellowship and that formed my lifestyle in school.

Class, Dining Hall, Fellowship.

I became very close to some people, amongst them is the lady I call my teddy bear, Maryam i.e Kim. 

I had a health condition that made me hold back from interacting with many people, especially the male students. I related more with people in my class and fellowship. I didn't want pity. I just wanted to live like everyone."

Then she addresses me.

"You know you played a huge role in the season of crises as well as  the good times."  Awwww... I had a brother with the same condition as she, "I guess that's why she feels I was so helpful," I thought to myself.

She continues

"When our immediate seniors graduated, new excos were announced. Maryam (Kim) and a few others were among the people selected to serve in the different units of the fellowship.

Was that when I noticed him? 

My heart began to soften towards him.

Butterflies in my stomach anytime I was around him. He used to smile a lot so you can imagine how I felt every time he smiled... 😍😍😍

He sometimes asked Maryam about me and even extended his regards through her on days I didn't attend meetings."

"Who's he?" I wondered, as I really can't remember Lilly and a brother eyeing each other back then.

She continues.

"He used to visit during holidays and even after school. He would use every opportunity he had to visit me in Lagos because he was based in a different state.

We also exchanged letters.

My mum would pass comments like 'I think this boy has an intention. This is not ordinary,' and I would pass it off as a friendship. 

I was too shy to acknowledge it and of course, as a young girl with Christian faith, coupled with the Christian upbringing of those days, we were taught to abstain from relationships. How do you want to vomit the word?

My wedding approached. Then, the e-mail had taken over letters, we were still communicating but I didn't have the nerve to invite him. I felt really bad he wasn't The One. I would always wonder why he never invited me to where he stayed while in Lagos. I wondered if he was being too careful as a brother, or if he had someone. But because I didn't want to get hurt, I never asked. 

As was his routine, he came looking for me this fateful day and my Mum directed him to Church where I went for rehearsal. We met. Before long, he noticed the ring on my finger. I had to break the news. I thought he was okay with it. 

I didn't know he was shattered. That was the day he meant to open up after several failed attempts. 😥

Well, he never told me until last year, Eleven years later.

Haba!  Why now? 

'I held on waiting for the right time,' he said.

Right time? Is there ever a right time?"

"We didn't talk as often after I got married and left the country, but he always checked on me every now and then.

"The only persons that knew were my brother and my friend at the university. You didn't know my people, so I felt safe confiding in them. Another person that may have known would be Maryam (Kim)," he told me.😁

"Meeeeeee!" I exclaimed. I couldn't resist asking. 

"Lilly! who is this person na? Please tell me," I pleaded, but the girl is stubborn. She chose to maintain the suspense.

She laughs at me and says

"Okay, since you don't know, let me keep quiet. I'm not sure he's open to going down memory lane. Or, you wanna guess?"

I tried, but no name I mentioned was the right one. I gave up temporarily and asked if it was a fellowship guy.

"You know say I no sabi anyone aside fellowship people."

I was completely lost!

So she continues.

To be continued...

This is the story of my friend, Lilly (not her real name). It's a story that most people will relate to, the story of lost love, a story of years filled with questions that may never be answered.

The story as told by Lilly and written by yours faithfully.

Photo Credit: Google